Write your own (success) story

The other day, I was out for a walk in the woods. The noise and the hectic pace from the city were far away ... and so were stress, worries and distraction. 

After a while, by breathing in fresh air and listening to the peaceful sounds of nature, my mind became calm and clear. There was no past. No future. I was in the here and now.

Places like forests are alive. And yet, they are very different from our cities, which are also full of life. But it's a different kind of life. Sometimes, it can be very hectic and stressful. Things and people are constantly trying to get our attention. We lose sight of what really matters to us and this causes dissatisfaction. In some cases, we don't even know why we are feeling this way. 

We just do what we think what we need to do. Or what other people expect from us. Or what we think what they expect from us. We just try to function. We strive for our goals and dreams. And are feeling inferior, because we weren't able to fulfill some of them. 

We are comparing ourselves with people we admire. People, who reached what we wish for ourselves. People, who seemingly live the life we always wanted to live: A happy, successful, fulfilling live. 

By standing there in the forest, listening to it's sounds and just watching at the landscape around me, I felt incredible. It felt as if the time stands still. My mind was calm and crystal clear. There was just me and this calm place. Far away from all this stress, distraction and the illusion that there are so many people who seemingly live so much happier and more successful lifes. All these things felt so unimportant there. 

From time to time, I need to leave everything behind me for a while  and spend some time at places like this to regain my focus. There, I am aware of my own existence. This wouldn't work if I would stay in my day to day environment. Because it's part of the problem. 

Like in any other area of our lives, the way we go about hobbies like language learning is influenced by our environment. Some influences help us to grow while other influences hold us back. People who have more experience in language learning can motivate us. They show us that's possible and that we can learn a language to a very high level, too.

But I realized that it can be sort of a trap when we try to follow the path of our idols and when we follow every word they say. Some people tend to trust their idols more than other language learners who may also have good advice. They seem to think that their idols are always right just because they had success. "He knows what he's talking about." 

I'm sure he does. But the thing is, learning a language is a very individual process. It's very difficult (maybe even impossible) to replicate someone else's success just by following his way of learning from A to Z. 

Plus, if we depend too much on someone else, we can't develop our own strenght. When I see someone who seems to be overly dependend on someone else I have the feeling that he's not trusting himself enough. Why else would he follow the words from someone else so eagerly? Why does he not think and decide for himself? Some people would be surprised what they would be able to do by themselves if they would stop copying their idols!

Plus, idols are not infallible and not everything that worked for your idol will work for you. They may give well-intentioned advice, but they don't know you as well as you do. You know best what you like to do and how. Just because your idol would do it differently doesn't mean that your way of learning your target language is wrong. If you do it in a way that works well for you, everything is fine!

That's why critical thinking and the courage to question your idols is so important. If we really want to improve our abilities we have to be independent from our idols. They may inspire us, but we should never follow them blindly.

I have my idols, too, but I prefer to do what feels right to me. Some things may have proved as not optimal later on, but I made my own decisions and improvements and this helped me much more than following other people's methods. The risk of making some wrong decisions is part of the path to success. 

I don't need someone else to tell me what to do. I don't need to ask someone for approvement, like, if something I plan to do is in conformity with his method or if I should do something. I ask for advice when needed, but I decide by myself if I use it and how I will do it in the end.

I learned from my own experiences what works best for me. This is something that no idol could teach you!

We may ask others for direction but at the end we have to go the way by our own strenght. We will face obstacles and find ways to overcome them. We will get lost but maybe we will find another way. That's what will make us proud of ourselves in the end! That's why we need to trust ourselves. 

Plus, not everybody will like every path. Some paths are for people who like to challenge themselves. Other people prefer paths which may be a bit longer but where they can see many interesting things on the way. 

Life's too short for walking on other people's paths. When it comes to hobbies like language learning it's better to choose our own path. Success stories from other people may inspire us, but they will never be our own. Not, if we want to be the hero of this story.

Don't copy. Make your own decisions and write your very own (success) story!